Senin, 23 Desember 2013


Grab your silver knife and stab me
Go on and hurt me
Let me bleed and feel the pain
Maybe that's the only way
To know that I'm a woman
With a beating heart

Shoot me with everything you got
Burn me 'till it's hot
I will stand before you and cry
Maybe that's the only way
To know that I'm alive
And still breathing

Sometimes death is like illusion
And life is a little bit more than that
I felt hurt too much
And suddenly, I feel nothing, no more
Only blood and flesh
Who have I become?

Come on, throw me your bullets
and tell me, who have I become?

Selasa, 10 Desember 2013


Coz I thought you were the one
I've always needed
I trusted you
But no, no, no...
Now, I don't think so

What I used to think about you
They fade like dandelions

It was nice to know you
You gave me memories
And opened the closed doors
I should thank you for that
But not more than that

And what I think about you now
I pity you
You and your own struggle
to win hearts like mine
I hope you would be lucky next time

I don't hate you
I won't
At least you made me understand
How to deal with disappointment
And I learned my lesson

Selasa, 03 Desember 2013

December The First

The cold rain fall just like it always is
December the first

You were my best friend
The one I did depend
Even when I have to be your shadow
Drown with you in sorrow
It was you I would follow
The bond that nobody could understand
Not even myself

It was love
Not that kind of lust
But I knew it was more than that
And when we slept next to each other
Talking about nothing all night
Crying, laughing, and dreaming
That's our green days
When we were young

Many Decembers past between us
And we took different path
that brought us apart
Then things change so fast
I am not who I used to be
So were you
That bond, strong as the mountain
Yet as fragile as the broken heart

Oh, December the first
I can't see you in your white
For I need to find my blue
We both has drown in different seas
But the wind will send my love to you
One that you have long forgotten
The last piece that has not yet broken
For nothing left in you I want

But your happy ending
Start at this December the first

Rabu, 20 November 2013


I run to the edge only to find
that you're still here
Under the sun, under the rain
I feel your presence when you're gone

Though your heart never lies in mine
The feeling my words can't express
The tears my eyes can't cry
They turned you into a ghost

You haunt me with love I can't feel
with anybody else
You haunt me with love you can't return
Why can't I simply turn away from you?

I run miles only to find
I'm changing myself into a ghost
To be with you
Until forever ends

Jumat, 15 November 2013

Perfect (Old Song on the Radio)

It's just another day when I heard an old song on the radio
The song that I used to sing when I remember you
Suddenly my perfect life is gone

I live my life without you and I'm doing fine
I thought you were only yesterday
But the old song on the radio reminds me of you
The days when I knew how hurt love could be

I can't decide what is in my heart
I think you and your happy life is perfect enough
Without me
But sometimes I wonder if you remember me
If you think of me

Oh, perfect life seems like a mask on my face
It's never been real me
I still cry, I still ask, "why?"
And it still hurts, too
Maybe it will be easier for me if I had never known you at all
But love has been too cruel

Old song on the radio dissolving into my mind
And the tears I haven't cried for a while
Your name has been long buried deep inside me
But it's still there
The old song is like rain, wash away everything
And there I find you again
With a perfect life I've never had

Rabu, 13 November 2013

I Feel Fine

I'm in paradise
and I feel fine

I hurt my feet
And my hands
But now, I feel fine

No one will hear me

But God
And I feel fine

I'm leaping outside the box
The walls that once protected me
But then trapped me
Now I'm breathing again

I'm in paradise
and I feel fine

Rabu, 06 November 2013


I hit the walls until my hand bleeds
Never heal the pain
Am I psychopath?

The whole world's turning against me
It's only me and my cracking heart
Screaming for the freedom I've never found

Why can't I just be gone and disappear
They never really want me anyway
They have refused to understand me

was it me who refused to see who I've been?

I break hearts, I swear words
Never chill my soul
And the hell burning inside it

I'm dissolved into rage
The storm that never left my head
Anger that made me a living undead

Why can't see what people see
And love the way the do
Why can't I be like them?

Is that who I am?